What did Steven Wright mean by: They say the universe is expanding. That should help with the traffic. - Steven Wright Comedian · USA Copy
+ My friend has a baby. I’m recording all the noises he makes so later I can ask him what he meant. Feraz Zeid, January 3, 2024January 10, 2024, Steven Wright, Friendship, Funny, Witty, 0 - Steven Wright Comedian · USA
+ I took a course in speed waiting. Now I can wait an hour in only ten minutes. Feraz Zeid, January 3, 2024January 10, 2024, Steven Wright, Funny, Humor, Waiting, 0 - Steven Wright Comedian · USA
+ It doesn’t matter what temperature the room is, it’s always room temperature. Feraz Zeid, January 3, 2024January 10, 2024, Steven Wright, Funny, Humor, 0 - Steven Wright Comedian · USA
+ I told her I knew when I was going to die because my birth certificate had an expiration date on it. Feraz Zeid, January 3, 2024January 10, 2024, Steven Wright, Birth, 0 - Steven Wright Comedian · USA
+ Why do you press harder on a remote-control when you know the battery’s dead? Feraz Zeid, January 3, 2024January 10, 2024, Steven Wright, Batteries, Funny, Humor, 0 - Steven Wright Comedian · USA
+ Whenever I think of the past, it brings back so many memories. Feraz Zeid, January 3, 2024January 10, 2024, Steven Wright, Funny, Humor, Memories, 0 - Steven Wright Comedian · USA
+ They say you’re not supposed to put metal in a microwave oven. They’re right. Feraz Zeid, January 3, 2024January 10, 2024, Steven Wright, Funny, Humor, 0 - Steven Wright Comedian · USA
+ Everything is within walking distance, as long as you have time. Feraz Zeid, January 3, 2024January 10, 2024, Steven Wright, Distance, Walking, 0 - Steven Wright Comedian · USA
I sit at my window and the words fly past me like birds — with God’s help I catch some. - Jean Rhys Writer · Dominica
Like many a modern parent, I had no clear notion of how to help my most troubled child. - Jean Sasson
I am currently in Haiti to help the Haitian people in their reconstruction. - Jean-Claude Duvalier Politician · Haiti
In the North the first words are, Help me; in the South, Love me. Explain - Jean-Jacques Rousseau Philosopher · Switzerland
What I do know is that wondering why you survived don’t help you survive. - Jeannette Walls Journalist · USA
Michael Jackson is the ultimate traffic accident. People can’t take their eyes off him. - Jeff Zucker
Certainly I think being an absentee farther helps in adding a layer of conflict. - Jeffrey Dean Morgan