Marriage is the perfection which love aimed at, ignorant of what it sought.

What did Ralph Waldo Emerson mean by:

Marriage is the perfection which love aimed at, ignorant of what it sought.

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This quote suggests that love, in its purest and most ideal form, seeks to realize itself in the institution of marriage. Love, according to this idea, is a force that propels two individuals towards a union that is more complete, more perfect than their separate existences. It is as if love, being ‘ignorant of what it sought’, is an instinctive drive, a blind force that leads us towards this ultimate goal of union without our conscious realization.

The ‘ignorance’ here could also refer to the fact that love, in its initial stages, is often characterized by passion, excitement and a certain degree of idealization of the other person. It is only in the context of a long-term commitment like marriage that love matures and deepens, and we come to truly know and understand the other person, with all their strengths and weaknesses. Thus, marriage is the ‘perfection’ that love aims at, in the sense that it is the arena where love is tested, refined and ultimately perfected.

In today’s world, this idea can be applied in various ways. For instance, in the realm of personal development, it suggests that we should approach relationships not just as a source of personal happiness and fulfillment, but also as a means of personal growth and transformation. It encourages us to view challenges and conflicts in relationships not as obstacles, but as opportunities to deepen our understanding of ourselves and others.

Furthermore, in a society that often emphasizes individualism and self-sufficiency, this quote reminds us of the value of commitment, interdependence and shared growth. It suggests that true fulfillment lies not in solitary pursuits, but in our connections with others, and in our ability to love and commit ourselves fully to another person.

However, it’s also important to note that the ‘perfection’ Emerson speaks of is not about achieving a state of flawless harmony or constant happiness. Rather, it is about striving towards a deeper, more profound understanding of love, which involves navigating the complexities, difficulties and paradoxes inherent in any intimate relationship.

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