This quote by Oscar Wilde is a paradoxical statement that seems to contradict itself at first glance. It suggests that those who are philanthropic, or generous and benevolent, lose their sense of humanity, which is confounding because we typically associate philanthropy with the highest expression of humanity. The ‘distinguishing characteristic’ Wilde refers to is the loss of humanity, which can be interpreted as a critique of the way some philanthropists may become detached from the very humanity they aim to serve.

This detachment could result from the power dynamics inherent in philanthropy. The philanthropist, having resources, is in a position of power over those who are in need. This power dynamic can lead to a sense of superiority or a savior complex, where the philanthropist views themselves as the ‘hero’ rescuing the less fortunate. This mindset can lead to a loss of shared humanity, where the philanthropist no longer sees those they help as equals, but as dependents or even projects.

Another interpretation could be that in focusing on the larger picture of helping humanity, philanthropists may lose touch with individual human experiences and emotions. They may become so absorbed in their mission that they overlook the personal stories, struggles, and triumphs of the people they are helping. In this sense, they lose a critical aspect of their humanity – the ability to connect with others on a personal level.

Applying this idea to today’s world, we can see it reflected in debates about ‘effective altruism’ – the notion that one should use evidence and reasoning to work out the most effective ways to help others. Critics argue that this approach can lead to a dehumanizing utilitarianism, where individuals become numbers in a calculation rather than unique human beings with their own worth and dignity.

In terms of personal development, Wilde’s quote serves as a reminder to stay connected with our shared humanity even as we strive to help others. It encourages us to approach philanthropy with humility and respect for the dignity of those we aim to help. Rather than viewing ourselves as saviors, we should see ourselves as partners in a shared endeavor to improve the human condition. It also prompts us to remember that every person we help has their own story, and that listening to these stories is as important as providing material aid.