A man who marries without knowing Bunbury has a very tedious time of it.

What did Oscar Wilde mean by:

A man who marries without knowing Bunbury has a very tedious time of it.

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This quote is from Oscar Wilde’s play, “The Importance of Being Earnest,” where “Bunbury” is a fictional character invented by a character in the play to escape social obligations. The quote suggests that a man who marries without having a “Bunbury” or an escape from the routines and responsibilities of married life will find it very tedious.

The quote is a commentary on the institution of marriage and the societal expectations that come with it. It underscores the need for individual freedom and personal space even within the confines of a committed relationship. Wilde suggests that without an outlet or a diversion (a “Bunbury”), life can become monotonous and dull.

In today’s context, the “Bunbury” could be any hobby, passion, or activity that allows a person to maintain their individuality and sense of self. It could also be seen as a metaphor for maintaining a balance between personal freedom and social obligations.

In terms of personal development, the quote underscores the importance of self-care and personal growth. It suggests that to thrive in any long-term commitment, one must not lose sight of their individual needs and desires. This idea can be applied not just to marriage, but to any long-term commitment, be it a job, a friendship, or a project. It’s a reminder that while commitments are important, so is personal happiness and fulfillment.

In essence, Wilde is suggesting that for any commitment to be truly fulfilling, it should not completely consume one’s identity or life. There must be room for personal growth, exploration, and freedom.

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